


How Do I Say I Love You

by Kendrickhier



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Dark One Emma, Excessive Drinking, F/F, Mentions of Violence, Time Travel, includes Snowing & Rumbelle & Wicked Outlaw, temporary Outlaw Queen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-12
Updated: 2015-07-20
Packaged: 2018-04-09 00:08:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4326126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kendrickhier/pseuds/Kendrickhier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SQW Summer '15: Set after the season 4 finale, Emma is the Dark One and finally makes her return.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Step 1: Bed Sharing

**Author's Note:**

> There's hardly anything I can say that won't spoil the story, so yeah, just enjoy the ride I guess. I don't think there's any triggers, but if I miss any, please let me know.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Once Upon a Time, nor Swan Queen Week, nor... Well, basically I own nothing.

Becoming the Dark One had taught Emma what exactly she had been taking for granted in Storybrooke, especially the things she hadn’t noticed before, for now she no longer had them. Hook had been pleasant company at times, he had made her feel less lonely, made her feel wanted and worth fighting for. For whatever reason, he hadn’t stopped chasing her since Neverland and refused to back down at the looming threat of death, for all men she loved died sooner or later. She’d come to realize this now, but she’d also come to realize that he wasn’t what she was looking for. It’s true that she loved him, but it didn’t run as deeply as it should.

Becoming the Dark One had proven as much; he was barely any comfort in the face of darkness.

Then there were her parents. Snow White and Prince Charming, it no longer sounded odd to her, but there was no denying they didn’t feel like actual parents to her. Yes, she valued them very much, loved them even, but they had never been able to give her what she needed. Not when she was an infant, not when she came to Storybrooke, and still not even when they had their memories back. And now they had baby Neal; _that_ would forever sound strange to her.

The darkness showed her just how much she’d been affected by them having another child. _A replacement,_ it chanted, _a second chance, like you’ll never have_ , and it hurts like all the times she got replaced as a child in the system.

Henry. Her son. She missed him dearly and loved him like she loved nothing else, but she couldn’t let him see her like this. She was supposed to be his hero, his _savior_ , but right now she felt anything but heroic. It didn’t feel like a sacrifice to save the town, it didn’t feel like a heroic act; it felt like giving into the darkness that had always been following her around, it felt like finally giving into the anger and the resentment and the sadness and it felt _so easy._

But there was no control and she’d certainly hurt him again, like she had when the Snow Queen was in town. Not again. _Never_ again.

And then there was Regina, the former Queen dubbed Evil Queen, the mayor, her rival and equal. If she hadn’t realized it before, the darkness had made it painfully obvious as if spelling it out to an oblivious child, patronizing. She _felt_ like a child. But Regina, the thought of her, it made her momentarily untouchable. Thinking of her was like a light in the eternal darkness that shrouded her, a heart shaped light. She was certain that if she’d had denied it any longer, it would literally spell the word for her, would give her pink glasses, scenarios in which they would kiss, whatever it would take for her to catch on. _Love._

She felt like an idiot for not realizing it sooner. Regina would agree on her being an idiot.

Regina grounded her even when she wasn’t present.

Regina, whom she’d sacrificed her soul for.

Regina, who she’d moved the freaking _moon_ with.

Regina, the mother of her child.

She was only slightly surprised to find herself in front of the mansion, more so by the fact that she hadn’t noticed she’d moved than that the location surprised her. The door opened and revealed a mildly pissed off witch, and Emma realizes she didn’t notice knocking either.

Regina, who doesn’t seem to know how to respond to what she sees on the porch. The initial anger makes place for disbelief quickly, her eyes widening at seeing Emma who looks so much different, but is definitely still Emma. It then switches to sadness and guilt.

Emma doesn’t give her a chance to let those emotions progress any further and pulls the woman in her arms, hugging her tightly.

The brunette seems to have finally decided on a reaction as she feels arms slip around her waist that return the embrace as tightly as she gives. Emma because Regina makes her feel lighter, and Regina to make sure that this is real.

It felt like hours went by, but then time has been relative to the Dark One and it could have been either seconds or minutes, which really doesn’t matter because it was _perfect._

But finally they separated again.

The first thing Emma notices is how Regina pulls herself together and it was like they were back to being the sheriff and the mayor before the whole darkness thing happened. The second thing she notices is that the darkness wanted to creep back in together with Regina’s mask, but was still kept at a reasonable distance.

“Miss Swan,” the brunette starts with a sigh, “do you realize some people are trying to sleep at this ungodly hour?”

It’s only now that she realizes Regina is wearing pajamas – silk ones, what else did she expect – and that it’s dark outside. _Oops._ “Sorry, it’s just…” _I didn’t realize what time it was. I was in a different realm just a second ago and I somehow ended up here. I love you._ “I couldn’t sleep.” It’s not a lie, she feels like she hasn’t slept in ages, but it’s not why she’s there and she knows it.

That earns her a raise of a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. “So, what, you decide I’m not allowed to sleep either?”

Frankly the dark circles around her tired eyes don’t particularly scream ‘I’ve been getting plenty of sleep lately, tonight no exception’. It suddenly feels like coming here was a terrible mistake. The darkness seems to agree and take this as an opportunity of creeping back in, but Emma won’t let it.

“I call bull shit. You look like hell, I feel like hell-“ _when I’m not around you,_ her brain adds, but she refuses to voice that, “-and we both can’t sleep.” The memory of Neverland hits her, when she’d slept much closer to Regina and nightmares couldn’t reach her. She’d never slept better than she had near the other woman.

As if reading her mind, Regina sighs and steps aside, “Come in, before I change my mind.”

Emma didn’t need to be told twice and entered the mansion, Regina leading her to one of the guest bedrooms and gesturing inside. “There’s a bathroom connected to the room, towels and a night gown are in the cabinet.”

Well, she’s gotten this far, she might as well try to push her luck.

“Or… I could sleep with you? I mean, only if you don’t mind, but it-”

“Okay.” She didn’t get to finish her sentence, and Regina was already making her way to the master bedroom.

“Okay?”

The brunette sighed, “I’m too tired to argue, Miss Swan. If it helps you sleep, you’re welcome to join me.” Once at the door, she turned around before going inside. “Don’t keep me waiting.”

With a shrug, she followed the woman inside. She hadn’t been in her bedroom before and she was surprised to find it had a lighter color scheme than she’d expected, but the bed was about what she imagined. Queen sized, satin sheets, very comfortable looking. They could both be sleeping on one end of a bed and never touch each other. Not that she planned to keep her distance, the bed was spacious which meant she’d probably be all over the place whether she wanted to or not; she might be a quiet sleeper, but she definitely wasn’t a still one.

A pair of thrown pajamas knocked her out of her thought process, barely in time to catch them rather than let them hit her face.

“As you seemed to have taken a shine to wearing my clothes, you might as well wear these.”

Emma rolled her eyes, “Please, it’s not like you didn’t “borrow” a turtleneck from time to time.”

“Just change and come to bed.”

So she did, it was rare for Regina to be so indulgent after all and she’d hate to waste that. Before long the two were underneath the cover, Regina on one end of the bed and Emma rolling on the other, trying to find a comfortable position. She ended on her right side, facing Regina somewhere near the middle of the bed, while Regina’s back was facing her.

There was a pretty big distance between the two of them still.

“If you snore, I won’t hesitate to kick you out,” the older woman commented, already sounding sleepy, which made Emma smile lightly.

“I won’t. Let me guess, no funny business either, no cuddling, just sleeping, each on our own side.”

A noncommittal hum followed, and soon her breathing evened out. Emma followed not long after, trying to stay true to her word in staying on her side of the bed. Both of them had the best night of sleep in a long time after that.

When the blonde woke up, she wasn’t surprised to find that she’d shifted in her sleep, but it was a pleasant surprise that she wasn’t the only one. She was lying on her left side now, and an arm was lazily draped over her. To call it cuddling was an exaggeration, _but she definitely missed me,_ Emma grinned.


	2. Step 2: Jealousy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not entirely pleased with how this turned out, but it's the best I can do today and it's acceptable, I guess. I'm harder on myself than anyone else is, so yeah. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter anyway.
> 
> Warning: There's mentions of violence, if that's a thing anyone is sensitive to? And yeah, language.

Emma had ended up lying in bed for the rest of the morning, not willing to get out before Regina would wake up. It turned out the woman really had needed her sleep, sleep that had eluded her for god knows how long. The blonde figured she was usually an early riser – which Regina would confirm if she were to ask – so this was a rare occurrence.

She’d dozed off again while watching the woman sleep, who was gone when she woke up again. She still felt relatively light, so she knew she couldn’t have gone far. Perhaps she was taking a shower, or making breakfast or something.

Lunch, she corrected herself when she glanced at the clock, showing that it was just past 12.

Just the thought of food alone was enough to get her out of bed and get dressed, descending the stairs in her search for Regina. Following her stomach, she planned to start with the dining room and the kitchen. She didn’t have to go farther than the foyer, where she could hear the woman talking in the living room. When she entered the room, Regina had just hung up and put away her phone.

“Morning, sleepyhead.” The blonde grinned.

It merely earned her an eye roll, “Says the one who just got out of bed.”

“Point taken.” Emma was going to protest, but figured that watching someone sleep could actually be perceived as quite creepy, so perhaps not mention that. Which also meant not bringing up the arm that was draped over her that morning. “Have you eaten anything yet?”

“No. I was planning to go to Granny’s, actually.”

Just the mention of the diner had her stomach growling, reminding her that she hadn’t had proper food in quite a while. Not that she knew how long that was exactly, her memories were foggy at best. “Awesome, I couldkill for a grilled cheese right now.”

Regina arched an eyebrow, “Really, Miss Swan? _Kill?_ ”

“Right, not literally of course, you know what I mean.”

“I do, dear, but not everyone will.”

The blonde felt her stomach drop a little at that notion, being so light around the woman almost made her forget that she was, in fact, the Dark One. She hadn’t looked in a mirror yet, but she dared to bet she looked a lot more threatening now, about as threatening as she actually was when the darkness took over her senses. Those times weren’t exactly like she wasn’t herself, she did feel like herself, but she mostly couldn’t control her emotions. It was as if every emotion she’d ever repressed came back in tenfold, and then some. It made not acting on them near impossible.

Emma nodded her understanding, “You’re right, I’ll try to watch my tongue. Now can we go? I wasn’t kidding about that grilled cheese.”

Shaking her head, Regina went towards the front door. “Such a child.”

\------

Once at Granny’s, she spots Robin and Roland. He seems so much taller than she can remember, _wasn’t he like 4 or something?_ It doesn’t matter, she has nothing to do with them, it’s purely coincidental that they happen to eat here as well.

Except that it isn’t a coincidence, and Regina’s heading straight towards them. _Well, guess we know who was on the phone now. He is her happy ending, remember?_ The darkness taunts her, and she can’t argue with it. It’s slowly starting to creep back in, and really why did Emma think Regina would be the solution? What was she expecting, that they were True Loves or whatever? That they would live happily ever after together instead of that dishonorable scum that doesn’t deserve someone like Regina?

No, Regina was probably her light because the blonde sacrificed herself for her. It would make sense.

Ruby is at their table to take their order and it seems the two forest monkeys waited up for them, only ordering their food now. Emma gets a grilled cheese and a hot chocolate as expected and Regina some kind of salad with coffee. What Robin and Roland get she doesn’t know, not having paid attention to them, she only noticed Roland wanted something that neither Robin or Regina agreed with. They seem to form a united front when it comes to the boy, and Emma doesn’t know why the sight does the opposite of pleasing her. She’s supposed to be happy for Regina, she’s clearly found her happiness.

Or has she? She’s reminded of how exhausted the woman looked when she first got there, and Robin didn’t seem to be anywhere near her. _No, this can’t be what her happiness looks like, right?_

As lunch progresses, she only find that she gets more and more… Well, something bad. She’s not sure what, and she’s pretty sure that she shouldn’t be feeling this either. But she can still control herself and not bash in anyone’s – _Robin’s_ , the darkness supplies – head, so it doesn’t matter much.

The grilled cheese tastes even better than she can remember and it’s a nice distraction. Not distracting enough to keep her from hearing the ongoing conversation, however. They’re essentially flirting with each other and it takes everything not to scream or throw something. Or worse, rip out his heart and crush it.

So instead she stands up and stomps towards the bathroom and takes it out on the wall. It doesn’t satisfy even a little, all it does is hurt her hand, which her magic almost automatically heals right after impact.

_You’re jealous_ , the darkness taunts, and she punches the wall again. She’s certain she broke a few bones, but it pulls back together as quickly as it shattered. The thought of Regina and Robin does infuriate her beyond believe and she’s starting to see red. She keeps punching, the banging undoubtedly audible throughout the building.

She’s breathing heavily when she’s done, but not any less homicidal. _Incinerate the prick,_ the darkness suggests. _Go back out there and choke the life out of him. Magic an anvil above his head and drop it on top of him._ The cartoonish scene in her head makes her snicker and she’s tempted, so tempted to do so just to see if it looks just as hilarious in real life.

That’s when Regina enters the restroom.

The darkness doesn’t fade this time. All she can think of is how _happy_ she must be with Robin.

“Emma, are you alright?” Regina’s voice is gentle, concerned, maybe even worried.

It makes her bark out a laugh. “Yes, I’m doing fucking fantastic. You’ve got your happy ending, I’m still alive, and everything is as good as back to normal.”

The brunette sighs. “Alright, Miss Sarcasm, talk to me. What’s going on?”

Out of habit, Emma brings up a hand to go through her hair, only to find she’d pulled it back and so she drops it on her side again with an agitated sigh. “Fuck, Regina. If you’re supposed to be happy with Robin, where the hell was he last night? Why did you let me sleep with you in your bed?”

“Robin had some things he needed to arrange with the Merry Men last night. I already told you why you were allowed in my bed: I was too tired to argue and you clearly had your mind set on sleeping with me for whatever reason that might be.”

Her answer was calm, and Emma felt stupid for expecting anything else. She slammed her head against the wall, pain exploding through her head, but quickly fading as her magic kicked in once again. “Fuck, I just… Seeing you with him just makes me so angry, he doesn’t fucking deserve you, you know that? You deserve so much better.”

A surprised “What?” makes her aware of what she’d just said out loud.

As much as Emma cares, the darkness really doesn’t and only wants to take this to the next level. “Do you know what it feels like to see a _thief_ smooch up to the woman you love, Regina? Right now it’s taking everything I’ve got not to walk up there and feed his heart to the wolves.”

The woman gapes at her. “You’re jealous?”

Upon her nod, Regina shakes her head. “Unbelievable. After all this time, you barge back in here like no time has passed and of course you have issues with Robin of all things. The happiness you sacrificed yourself for, nonetheless.”

“Regina, I-“

“No, you don’t get to do this,” the brunette interrupts. “It’s been two years, Emma! TWO YEARS! We’ve been looking for you everywhere, after Merlin was a dead end I-”

“Hold up! Two years? What’s today’s date?”

“You don’t know? It’s the 27th of May, 2016.”

“Seriously?! I thought I was maybe stuck for a few months, but two years… The only thing that kept me sane was the thought of you, you know? _You_ make the darkness go away, Regina. I don’t know what this means, but shit Regina, I think I’m in love with you. It would explain everything.”

She shakes her head, “I can’t do this, Emma. You’re too late.”

Before she can ask what that means, Regina turns around and leaves, leaving Emma alone with her thoughts. _You’re too late,_ echoes in her mind, and the darkness empowers this though. It’s meant to work as a taunt, but all it does is give her an idea.

_But what if I weren’t too late?_


	3. Step 3: Time Travel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I managed to finish it! This chapter became longer than expected because I fell in love with the toddlers! I was planning to add the first summon to this chapter too, but I think I'm going to save that for tomorrow. This is the least SQ chapter of the week, but tomorrow will make up for that! (I hope.) Without further ado I present to you, the third chapter!

After what happened at Granny’s, Emma had poofed herself to Gold’s shop, hoping he could help her with figuring out how to go back in time. Not like he had managed before, but he knew a lot about magic in general and had found a way in the past as well, even if that was just a way of reversing it for the return trip.

Well, he’d have to be alive for that. It was very possible he hadn’t survived the removal of darkness, though knowing Gold, he’d have found a way.

Belle was doing some inventory behind the counter, but other than Belle the shop seemed to be empty, so she stepped out of the shadows towards the woman. “Belle.”

Her voice sounded positively gleeful and was a far cry from what they were used to from Emma, but it was more childlike than creepy.

The brunette looked at her, mildly shocked at the sight, gasping, “Emma?”

“Are there any other Dark Ones?” Emma chuckled.

“But you were… You didn’t respond to summons, so we thought…” Belle stammered.

So people thought she hadn’t survived? _I wonder if Snow and Charming gave up, too._ “What, that I was dead? _Please,_ as if some darkness could kill me.” She shrugged. “How’s Gold holding up?”

“He’s…”

Belle struggled to find the right words to say and Emma began to think maybe he _had_ passed away. Served him right after all he’d done frankly, but she should have known better when another voice emerged from the back.

“Miss Swan, what a pleasant surprise.” The man was walking with his cane again and seemed more frail than before, but he still looked better than he had before. Happier, lighter somehow.

Emma grinned, “Ah, good, you’re still alive. That means you can help me.”

“To the point as always, I see. What can I help you with?”

“I need to travel back in time.”

“I’m afraid I’m no longer in the magic business, dearie.” Rumple said, deflating a bit at the mention of magic. He probably lost his ability to use it, Emma figured, he didn’t have any magic before he became the Dark One after all.

“Oh, but I don’t need magic, I just need a method. You know more about magic than anyone I know.”

“Time travel is not my area of expertise, it was something I thought impossible before Zelena proved otherwise.”

Emma shook her head, “You found a way before, you just don’t remember because you took a memory potion afterwards. Isn’t there another loophole now that it’s been used already?”

“I’m afraid not, Miss Swan. Zelena’s pendant used the rest of her magic to keep her alive, there are no remnants left from that spell. Unless you are willing to start from the scratch, there is no way.”

“So where do I begin if I want to start from the scratch?”

“That’s something I can’t help you with, if you want to go down that road, you’re going to need the one who went there before.”

“Zelena, got it. Where does she live these days, still in the mental ward?”

“Of course not, Regina was generous enough to let her have the house she was hiding in when she first got here, so long as she is on her best behavior. A second chance, if you will.”

The blonde nodded, “Alright, thanks.”

The words were barely out of her mouth when she poofed out of there, not willing to waste any more time than necessary, right in front of the door of the farmhouse. She had no idea what it looked like on the inside, else she probably would have poofed herself inside. Instead she had to knock or break in, and knocking was probably the quickest way to find out if she was there or not.

That was answered quickly when she heard a squealing child from the inside, shortly followed by the door being opened, revealing Zelena with a toddler in her arms. “Well, isn’t this delightful? The savior’s back in town, or should I say the Dark One?”

Emma rolls her eyes, “Call me whatever you want, it doesn’t matter. I need your help with something.”

“You hear that, sweetheart? The town’s hero needs _my_ help, how odd is that?” She coos the little girl, making her giggle, before turning to Emma. “You must be at your wit’s end to come to me for help, what is so big the Dark One can’t handle it herself?”

“Time travel.”

“Oh my, you best come inside then.” The redhead steps aside and gestures towards the living area. “Can I offer you some tea? I find it talks a lot more pleasantly over tea.”

Shrugging, Emma steps inside. “Sure, why not.”

While Zelena went to make some tea – she’d make sure to check if it was poisoned or not, just in case – she made herself at home on the couch. The little girl hobbled from the kitchen towards her, inspecting her with great care. She giggles when pointing at Emma’s face, “Glitter!”

“What?” Her hand shoots up to her face, still not having taken a look in a mirror. She notices that, indeed, her skin is a bit rougher on her cheekbones and around her eyes, but is at least glad to find that it’s not everywhere. Well, the curse of the Dark One would have some sort of effect on her, at least she doesn’t have the same reptilian skin Rumple had.

“Glitter!” The toddler repeats gleefully.

“If you say so.” She grins. Not even the darkness can resist young children, it seems. Or maybe just _her_ darkness, who knows how this works anyway. “What’s your name?”

“Na-di-a.” She pronounces carefully, looking so very proud of herself for nailing it.

“Hello Nadia, I’m Emma.”

“E-mma.” Nadia tries, grinning when she succeeds and running over to her. “Up!”

That makes her laugh lightly, “Not a very shy child, are you? Alright,” she says, getting a hold of the toddler. “Up you go!” The blonde sets her on top of her lap.

Nadia seems fortunate enough to have inherited Robin’s hair color, but combined with Zelena’s curls. Her hair hangs loosely around her face, the curls just not reaching her shoulders yet. Emma guesses she’s nearing 2 years old, which would make sense considering the time she’s missed.

Emma continues to entertain the toddler, who seems very intent on touching the glitter on her face, until the witch comes back into the room with two cups of tea on a silver tray. “Nadia, honey, why don’t you go play in your playroom? Mommy needs to discuss some boring adult stuff with the savior.”

The toddler looks like she’s about to object, until an idea seems to hit her and she jumps off the couch, running towards a door that supposedly leads to said playroom. She dares to bet Zelena is going to have fun with whatever Nadia is up to. Something tells her it’s going to have something to do with glitter.

“The kid seems cute,” Emma comments, blowing on her tea. Though the scalding hardly matters to her, it’s still more enjoyable when it’s the taste that stands out rather than the temperature.

“She is, until something doesn’t go her way and she throws a magical temper tantrum.” She shakes her head fondly, “Gets that from me, I’m afraid.”

“I can only imagine.”

“So, pleasantries aside. You’re here for the spell itself, right?”

“Yeah, you’re the only one who pulled it off, so…”

“Indeed. There have been many spells for the same purpose actually, but none of them were complete. I’ve managed to fix one of them, but I’m sure you remember some of the ingredients.”

Emma nods, “More or less. A baby, Regina’s heart, Charming’s courage… A brain?”

“So naïve, even as the Dark One,” Zelena chuckles. “Yes, those were things I used, but it’s about what they symbolize more than what they are. The newborn baby is a symbol of pure innocence, untainted by what evils our realms have to offer. The brain wasn’t an actual brain, it was a magical copy, really, and symbolized knowledge. The heart symbolized love, though the resilience was a nice bonus, I must admit.”

“Innocence, knowledge, love, and courage.” The blonde made a mental note of those four things, already trying to find different ways of accessing them. Using a baby for innocence might be effective, but it was also a bit cruel to the child. Since the spell was officially incomplete when Zelena performed it, there was no telling what would have happened to Neal if they hadn’t stopped it. Perhaps he would have even died. _No, I can’t do that._

“Did you know the witches of Oz represented those same things? It’s how I found out innocence was missing. Ironically, they were also missing the witch representing innocence. Quite desperate they were, wanting me of all people for the position.”

That gets her attention. “Do you think the four witches could perform the spell together? If they represent each of those things, they only need a way to execute it, right?”

“I’m afraid it’s not that simple, as far as I know they still don’t have a new witch of the west. Dorothy simply returned to Kansas and I’m far from innocent, regardless of what I’d wish. Even if they were complete, they would still need a way of traveling through the realms.”

Emma takes a sip of her tea. “Okay, so that’s not an option.” She sighs, maybe she should return to Gold’s shop and ask for Belle’s assistance. She figured out what spell Zelena was preparing after all, maybe she has a book with incomplete time traveling spells that she could possibly fix. But then again, she didn’t know much about magic, let alone what ingredients would be missing from it. “Is there anything else I could use for innocence?”

“Do you not think I would have used an alternative, had I known one? Wicked as I am, harming babies is hardly on my list of favorite things.”

Finishing her tea, the blonde stands up with a sigh. “Fair enough. Thanks for your help, Zelena.” _Even if it wasn’t enough. Even if we weren’t on the best terms and you really had no reason to help me, about as much reason as I had for asking you._ “I should get going, say bye to Nadia from me.” It was getting later and she needed a place to sleep. Only one place to go for that.

As if on cue – it probably _was_ on cue – the toddler comes running in, glitter on her face and hands, leaving a trail behind her, waving enthusiastically. “Bye Emma,” she chirps.

Emma waves to her as she poofs, “Bye,” laughing as she catches an exasperated Zelena right before she leaves. Yes, she would definitely enjoy the glitter Nadia had spread.

She landed straight in the living room of the Charmings, figuring she shouldn’t just sleep there without greeting them first. They probably want to know she’s alive, and she kind of wants to know if they gave up on finding her or were still holding onto whatever sliver of hope they had left. She couldn’t bring herself to view them as her parents anymore, not after those two years locked in with the darkness that kept telling her the story of how they _abandoned_ her and _replaced_ her and didn’t want an adult daughter, even though she was sure that was bull shit. It never failed to get to her.

“Hey guys.”

Snow and David were playing with Neal in the living room. It’s such an odd sight for her to see her baby brother so grown up already, he was almost three by now and she’s missed so much. Her voice didn’t fail to get all their attention, though.

“Emma! You’re here! Thank goodness you’re alive, we were so worried about you!” Snow basically shot to her feet to tackle her in a tight hug, tears forming in her eyes. Emma wraps her arms around her in return, and David is around the both of them before she knows it. It’s almost suffocating, but it’s proving the darkness wrong. She _is_ wanted, it’s not a replacement, it’s an addition and there’s a difference.

Neal doesn’t seem to be sure what is happening, but can sense the excitement and runs over to them, hugging their legs to join in on the group hug. It makes the three of them chuckle, two of them with varying amounts of tears on their face, and break apart to scoop up the toddler.

He looks surprised at the tears, touching Snow’s cheek softly. “Mommy sad?” The boy whispers softly.

“No sweetie, those are happy tears, sometimes we cry because we’re happy.”

“Neal, this is your older sister Emma.” Charming chimes in.

His eyes seem to light up with recognition then and she wonders what exactly they have been telling the kid about her. “Emma!” He squeals, making a grab for her and squirming to try to get to her. Snow is clearly struggling not to accidentally drop him while handing the boy over to Emma.

Emma chuckles, hugging her little brother tight. “What have you been telling him?”

“You may have featured as the hero to all his bedtime stories.” David answered.

“It was nothing but the truth, though.” Snow adds. “He particularly likes the story where you slay a dragon.”

“Have you told him she resurrected and still walks around town?”

That makes the boy gasp, “Dragon?!”

Emma laughs, “Not anymore, she was actually human, but she could turn into a dragon. Now she’s simply a mother, right?”

David nods, “Yes, she and Lily are still living together, making up for lost time.”

“Good. So can I stay here tonight? I’m kind of tired, so…”

“Of course! Your room is still ready for you.”

“Thanks,” she nods, poofing herself upstairs. Emma still had a lot of thinking to do as to how she would be able to travel back, if at all. Else she would have to settle on seeing Regina with a mediocre happiness, herself having none, and quite possibly end up as bitter as the Evil Queen used to be. She really did not want that to happen.

She fell asleep still thinking about where, when, and how she needed to go, which thus influenced her dreams. She dreamt of what had happened on that fateful night, getting caught up in the dream.

_“No! There has to be another way.” Regina yells, surrounded by the cloud of darkness that is consuming her. It’s more a grunt or even a growl than it is a scream, really._

_She had to do something about this, it needed to be tethered to a person and she was the one holding the dagger. “There isn’t. You worked too hard to have your happiness destroyed.”_

_“No!” Her father yells._

_Emma turns towards David and Snow, a lot meeker now that the realization is dawning on her of what she is about to do. “You figured out how to take the darkness out of me once. You need to do it again, as heroes.” Tears are in her eyes by now, but she can’t dwell on it, she has to say goodbye quick or Regina will be a goner._

_“Emma! Emma, please!” Hook cries, running towards her in his last attempt to change her mind. “No, don’t do this.”_

_She turns towards him, looking at him with tearful eyes. This is her last chance to say what she’d wanted to say ever since she watched him die and realized just how painful that had been. “I love you.” The blonde enjoys the last physical closeness with him, before pushing him away and turning towards Regina. Goodbye kisses are not a thing, she will not do this, there isn’t the time._

_“No!” Hook yells desperately, especially after that new revelation._

_But he is too late. She flings the dagger into the darkness and it starts attacking her instead, the weapon working as a lightning rod. There is only pain then, and flashes of light._

More flashes of light. Emma is being consumed by the darkness instead and is done a lot quicker than with Regina. She realizes she is no longer inside her body, but is now watching herself get consumed, watches herself throwing a last glance at what she is sacrificing herself for, towards Regina, and Robin who is holding her. She looked more distressed than she should, doesn’t she?

But Emma knows why that is now, or thinks she knows. The Emma she is watching is gone now, the tornado of darkness fading, and the dagger drops on the ground with her name on it. She’s never seen this part before, she wasn’t there, but she’s still here watching from the shadows. It’s impossible not to notice Regina’s reaction first, who breaks free from Robin’s hold that seemed to be holding her back more than that it consoled her. She drops to her knees in front of the dagger and picks up it, looking at the name briefly before cradling it to her chest.

Robin is behind her yet again, tries to console her, but there is no consolation for this woman, not now.

Regina’s reaction is so extreme, she has to know how Hook responds to this after her love confession. He looks like he is about to cry, and he runs away, runs and runs and runs until she can no longer see him, towards the harbor. She doesn’t doubt that he’ll be on his ship to grieve for her, but finds she doesn’t care too much about it.

Snow and David are holding onto each other, hiding in each other, crying. Consoling each other, or attempting to do so, trying not to watch the dagger. It would be impossible to see it anyway, the way Regina is holding it so close to her chest. She could cut herself if she’s a little more careless, but it doesn’t look like she’d care even if that were to happen. She looks like the thing could impale her heart and she still wouldn’t care.

She knows then that she made the right decision coming back here.

Wait, coming back here?

She frowns, realizing that this doesn’t feel like a dream as it had before. She needs to check this; it wouldn’t be the first time her magic was a bit wonky, and with the power she possessed that she had already accidentally travelled realms with, it would surprise her if it had sent her back in time this time. She should really work on the control of her magic, which was again something only Regina could help her with.

She looked around to find something to punch, something that wouldn’t make too much noise. The brick wall she was hiding behind seemed well enough. Balling her fist, Emma punched the wall, making sure to make it so it would scrape her skin off to make it as painful as possible. She had to bite her lip not to scream; she was definitely not dreaming, that pain was very real.

Well, at least she managed to travel back, even if it was beyond her control.


	4. Step 4: Mistaken for a Couple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I still finished this, but I'm very glad I did! Enjoy the fourth chapter!

Emma had lingered a while longer after healing her hand and finding out this was all real. Regina had barely been able to control herself, yelling at Robin when he touched her to go away and leave her alone. She was too distraught to use magic, or she would have poofed herself, Emma knew she would have.

Snow and Charming were the first to pull themselves together enough to function, next to Robin who had actually granted Regina’s wish and had fled into the forest to join his Merry Men. They had approached the brunette carefully, speaking gently to get her back to her feet, to get her home, despite their own sadness. It was obvious to them that the strong and fearsome woman had shattered and couldn’t be the supporting factor in this situation, and thus they had to be.

It had worked. They’d calmed the brunette down enough for her to be able to poof back to her room, dagger still in hand. Then they returned home, back to Neal who was still an infant and was very much dependent on them.

Emma was sure they could manage, but it was Regina who she was worried about. 

It had pained her dark heart to see the woman so devastated and she vowed to never allow that to happen again. She wanted nothing more than to go to the woman and console her, to poof to her house right this instant, but knew she needed time to process this. She’d call for her when she was ready, right? They all knew how the dagger worked, more or less.

And so she waited. Not knowing what she could do in the meantime, she decided to check the harbor from the shadows. It didn’t surprise her much when she saw the Jolly Roger on the horizon, already having set sail.

She’d definitely made the right decision to go back for Regina and not this guy. If he couldn’t bear with the thought of her as the Dark One, if he abandoned her just like everyone else had, he wasn’t worth it. Regina kept the dagger close rather than run from it.

Sighing, she goes for a walk to kill the rest of her time, staying aware as to not run into anyone just yet. She wants Regina to be the first one to see her, the rest can wait tomorrow, but she still hadn’t called out to her yet.

Emma walks past the place where Henry’s castle had been located and smiles, remembering the first time she’d found him there. It feels like that was ages ago, while it was only four years ago, two in this timeline.

Time is going too fast, and she’s most likely going to live a few centuries, if not longer.

_You’re going to see all your loved ones age and die,_ the darkness reminds her, though it feels more like a taunt than a reminder.

She shakes her head, she could find a way to keep them alive together with her should they want to, there’s no way there’s no magical solution for that, not with her power. Regina had found a way to stop an entire town from aging once, even though it was more a side effect than anything, surely there was a similar way to stop a single person from aging without putting them in an endless time loop. But first she has to get to Regina.

It dawns on her that she has to confess her love again and that it’s still possible to confess _too early_ , and thus still screwing up what chance she has. And she can’t travel in time constantly to fix it either, there has to be some kind of universal rule that prevents paradoxes, or maybe an automatic reset if there _is_ a paradox?

The blonde groans, this time stuff is starting to hurt her head, maybe let Doctor Who deal with all that stuff and just not fuck up this time, or dealing with the consequences if she does. One chance, just like any other human has.

She will probably have to tell Regina about her ‘first’ appearance in two years, though. And essentially the rest of town. _Well, fuck. I could have thought that through a little better._

Her thoughts are stopped short when she hears her name being called. Or, more accurately, it calls upon her magic and echoes through her body like a freaking gong. It basically shuts down her brain and her magic obeys on instinct.

She groans lightly when she appears in front of Regina, white smoke clearing up. Regina responds before she does and she’s caught up in the teary eyed brunette’s arms before her brain even works properly again.

“Emma…” Regina breathes, “I thought we lost you…”

Emma wraps her arms around the woman in turn, the haze finally gone. The darkness is, too, and it’s just as refreshing as the first time it was pushed aside. “Never. You know I’m too stubborn to die.”

The woman laughs lightly, before pulling back with a final sniffle. “You’re okay?”

She nods, “Yeah.” Technically it’s not a lie. _She_ is okay, but she can’t say the same for her present time counterpart. Who is stuck in the Enchanted Forest, in Rumple’s old cell, which was miraculously fixed somehow. She was positive they’d destroyed it with the squid ink last time. The blonde hadn’t seen her captors, so she didn’t know if they were capable of fixing it themselves. It clearly didn’t work as well as the old version, as she’d managed to escape.

“Oh, and next time you want to call me, please do it over the phone,” Emma whines. “The dagger sucks bigtime.”

“Only if you don’t disappear on us again. Don’t _ever_ pull another stunt like that.”

“You know I can’t promise that. What if you’re in danger again?”

Regina shakes her head, “I can take care of myself, Miss Swan. You shouldn’t have done this, that darkness should be inside _me_ , not you.”

“No, Regina. The darkness, it wasn’t tethering to you, it was _destroying_ you. I couldn’t let that happen.”

“You could have thrown the dagger at me and let me tether to it!”

Emma was surprised to find it was more a cry of desperation than of anger. “Even if I could have, I already told you, I’m not going to let your happiness be destroyed.”

The woman deflates slightly, “But what about your own happiness?”

“I’ll get another shot. I’m immortal now, remember?”

“What makes you so sure? You saw what happened to the other villains, to Rumple, even to me.”

_You make me sure, how can you be so oblivious!_ “Just trust me on that one, okay?”

Regina lets out a sigh, dropping it for now. “Fine.”

She looks awfully tired, and it’s now that Emma notices it’s past midnight. “Hey, how about we catch some sleep? It’s been a long day, I really don’t feel like facing my parents right now and you summoned me, so...”

That makes the brunette roll her eyes, “The guest room is right across, Miss Swan, you can’t miss it.”

“So we’re back to Miss Swan now, hm?” She smirks, making her way to the door without looking away from the woman.

“ _Good night_ , Emma.”

Though the brunette sounded slightly exasperated, she still used her name and it makes her smile. “Good night, Regina.”

The guest room maybe hadn’t been what she’d hoped for, but she can’t always be lucky. Plus this Regina hadn’t searched for her for 2 years straight, this Regina only saw her disappear in the darkness just hours before. The guest bed wasn’t as comfortable as she remembers the one in the master bedroom to be, but she’s not surprised to find that it’s still very cozy and of the best quality money can buy. How much money did she make as Mayor, anyway? Or had she secretly stashed away a few millions?

In the morning they went to Granny’s for breakfast, and Emma tried not to think about how she’d done this before and found Robin waiting for the woman as they walked towards the diner. It came as more than a relief to her when she saw the diner was free of any forest men. They took a seat in a booth near the back, and Ruby came to get their orders as usual. It wasn’t a surprise that Regina ordered another light meal, whereas Emma got herself a bear claw, which earned her a disgusted look and a comment on her eating habits.

They’d made light and pleasant conversation during the wait, and continued to do so while eating. Until there was no accessible territory left, and Regina finally addressed one of the elephants in the room. “Have you taken a look at your face yet, Emma?”

Emma looks up from her donut. “Hm?”

“Your face.”

“What’s wrong with my face?” she questions, perfectly aware what her face looks like. Heck, she’d done her hair in front of a mirror today. “Do I have a third eye that I didn’t know of? Second pair of lips?”

The woman huffs, “I’m sure you would have noticed a major change like that. No, I’m talking about your skin. It looks like a toddler spilled glitter all over you.”

“Maybe the fairies sprinkled fairy dust all over me while I was asleep?” Emma suggests with a grin, taking another bite from her bear claw. Still chewing, she continues, “No, I’m aware, I noticed two-“ she swallows the bear claw down, trying to cover up her brief slip, “-this morning.”

Regina leans a bit forward, giving her a look and bringing a hand closer to her face, “May I?” Upon Emma’s nod, she curiously caresses the blonde’s cheek to discover the structure of the changed skin.

Of course it’s then that Robin comes in and sees them, surprise gracing his face. “Oh,” he says, drawing the attention of both women.

Regina retracts her hand faster than lightning, gasping his name with wide eyes. “It’s not what it l-“

“No, no, I know exactly what it is, Regina, you don’t have to explain or deny it. I thought I’d seen it before, but I just figured since you were with me…” He trails off, before recomposing himself. “A man with honor knows when to back off, I won’t stand between you two anymore. Zelena needs me anyway, so…” He gestures awkwardly towards the door while backing up. “I hope she makes you happy.”

He’s out the door before he could hear Regina meek “But we’re not together”.

Emma has to try not to laugh at what just transpired, and the darkness inside of her is positively giddy, but she manages to contain herself. Especially when Regina throws her a furious glance.

_Uh oh._

“Do you have to keep ruining my life, Miss Swan?” she growls, angry tears forming in her eyes, though they are unmistakably also from sadness. She just basically god dumped. By a misconception.

“Wait, how is it _my_ fault he just assumed we’re together? I’m sorry, Regina, but it sounded to me like he was already looking for an excuse. He could have stayed and wait for an explanation.”

“An explanation you could have given him!”

“You could have gone after him, you know? That’s what I would do if the person I loved walked out on me like that.” She takes a deep breath to calm herself, because she can see this is only spurring the brunette on more. “You could _still_ go after him to explain, I’m sure he’d understand.”

Regina shakes her head, but her anger is fading quickly and is replaced by sadness. “It’s too late, you heard him. He chose Zelena and his child.”

Emma places her hand on top of the other woman’s, stroking her hand softly with her thumb. _It’s too late,_ echoes through her head. It’s the second time she’s heard it, but it seems the roles have reversed. Part of her is relieved, but the bigger part is pained by seeing Regina heartbroken yet again. “Hey, you know this isn’t your only shot at happiness, right?”

She scoffs out a laugh, “Of course it is, he is supposed to be my destiny, my soulmate.”

“If a tree hugging jerk like that is supposed to be your soulmate, the universe made a mistake.”

“Fairy dust is never wrong, Tinkerbell said so herself. Who else could it be?”

“Someone who wasn’t in the Enchanted Forest when the dust was used?” Emma suggests, subtly trying to refer to herself, but using the word born in that sentence is both creepy and too obvious. “Perhaps she can do it again, to see if it’s still Robin.”

Regina makes a face, “And get confirmation I messed up my life? I’ll pass.”

“A lot has happened since then, including a 28 year long curse that froze time and got everyone to a different realm _without magic._ I’d say you have a hand in changing destiny.”

That gets a proper reaction, two eyebrows arching up. “Point taken.”

Emma grins, “So, what do you say? A visit to the fairies worth your time?”

“Let’s go.”


	5. Step 5: Best Friend Romance

After a brief consideration on whether they should visit Tinkerbell or Mother Superior, they decide that it’s probably better to visit the actual fairies than a disgraced one. Though they still pose as nuns to the outside world, it’s definitely not religion that is being practiced between those walls. No, it’s where they store the newly acquired fairy dust nowadays and protect it, as well as doing… other fairy stuff, whatever it is fairies do.

Blue has been getting less troubled when it comes to being around Regina, the excuse of “but she is the Evil Queen” beginning to wear off, thankfully. It certainly makes this a lot easier, but that still doesn’t mean she’s particularly willing to _help_ her at this stage of the game. Altogether, the response could have been worse.

Blue scoffs, “You want me to use _pixie dust_ to find your True Love, while it’s been done once before? You realize pixie dust is never wrong, don’t you?”

It’s Emma that replies to this. “We just want to make sure it’s been done right. I mean, there’s a reason Tinkerbell lost her wings, right?”

“There is, but not being a good fairy doesn’t mean she’s incapable.” The fairy interjects. “Besides, there is no pixie dust in this world. Even if I wanted to, it’s impossible to replicate the spell.”

Regina deflates and looks ready to give up.

Emma, however, just shakes her head. “I remember being told that pixie dust is essentially the same thing as fairy dust, just more powerful. Couldn’t you try with fairy dust instead? I mean, everyone from the Enchanted Forest is in Storybrooke, it’s not a lot of ground to cover, so it doesn’t have to be very powerful, right?”

She seems to think this over, before nodding. “It could work.”

Then Blue is off to get some fairy dust to perform the spell, and Emma looks at Regina. This could be the moment of truth. If pixie dust is never wrong, it should head into the forest and seek out Robin. If her darkness is anything to go by, it might go for her instead, probably _will_ go for her instead.

She swallows, not knowing how the brunette would respond to that, especially so shortly after essentially being dumped.

Regina doesn’t seem any more at ease, anxiety probably eating away at her just as much, if not even more. Taking a deep breath, the blonde gently wraps an arm around her shoulders. The woman doesn’t shrug her off, and she’s not sure if that’s a good sign or a bad one. “How are you holding up?”

“About as well as anyone who just got dumped for their sister would, I reckon,” is the terse answer. “What if Robin really is my True Love?”

Begrudgingly, Emma says what she thinks is the truth, “Then this is just another obstacle to overcome and he won’t last with Zelena. True Love conquers all, or something like that.” She shakes her head, it’s the very possibility she fears and hopes is not the case, because Regina truly does deserve better. “But what if it’s someone else?”

The brunette laughs, “Like who? Everyone here was present then too, unless you think Robin was right about us.”

Emma laughs awkwardly, inwardly cringing, because _ouch_ , that comment stings. Literally; the darkness throbs threateningly in her veins. “Well, they do say love comes unexpectedly.”

Even though it’s anything but unexpected if it were her. Everything that happened between the two of them, even their lives without each other, they just kept pointing at each other. Their lives intertwined in many ways, and their combined magic could even cross realms, which supposedly only True Love could do. They’d even moved a celestial body with the two of them, for their shared son.

No, anything but unexpected, though they’ve both been oblivious to it for a long time. They’ve been friends, friends who sacrifice their souls and happiness for each other. _Friends._

Regina seems to think the notion is ridiculous, that love can be unpredictable, and just shakes her head. Luckily for them it’s then that Blue returns. “This should do the trick. Are you ready, Regina?”

The woman nods, though she looks like she’s about ready to shit bricks. She can see how Regina wouldn’t have entered that tavern to approach her supposed soulmate all those years ago.

Blue steps forward, standing in front of Regina, and Emma stands next to them. They kind of stand in a triangle this way when the fairy activates the spell and sets the dust free.

The dust flies right past them, circling the room as if it can’t find an exit, inspecting the walls. As if to make a statement, it passes through the wall and returns to the room, before flying right back to them and dropping in front of Blue. Which also happens to be in front of Emma, right between her and Regina.

Mother Superior looks concerned though, frowning.

“What happened?” Regina demands, sounding more like herself now than she did moments before. “With Robin the pixie dust surrounded him, why did it just drop there?”

That was a very good question and Emma was wondering the exact same thing. Was the fairy dust not strong enough after all? Or maybe it tried to go after present time Emma, who was very much in a different realm right now? She should probably ask Blue about that in private, about how it would respond to different timelines.

“It should have worked, I’m not sure what went wrong.”

Emma was tempted to suggest that maybe it did work, and that they could try it on her parents to see how exactly it would show the results, but realized that meant consciously suggesting that maybe _she_ was Regina’s True Love.

The blonde swallows and opens her mouth to speak, but Regina is ahead of her. “This was a waste of time,” she spits angrily.

Before anyone could get another word in, the woman poofs herself out of there. Emma sighs. “Thanks for trying. You could check the spell on Snow and David, I’m sure they wouldn’t mind helping out.”

Speaking of them, she should pay them a visit, and so she poofs herself over to their loft first.

\------

The visit to them isn’t too eventful, it’s quite similar to the one she had two years in the future. They hardly pay her physical changes any mind and hug her as if they haven’t seen her in ages, relieved to see her alive. She told them Blue might need their help with something, leaving out that she’d been there with Regina and for what purpose. Also she requested that Henry would stay there for the night, which they of course readily agreed to.

Thinking it would have taken enough time for said woman to calm down a little bit, she poofed herself to the mansion, figuring she’d be there. She hadn’t been wrong. Despite the tendency the woman had developed lately to hide in her vault, she was actually in her house this time. Her office, to be exact.

There were glass shards on the floor, as well as several thrown books, and it didn’t take a lot of guessing as to what had transpired here moments before. Regina herself had broken down on the ground, sobbing against one of the bookshelves.

Emma figured making herself known would probably be the best course of action. “Hey.”

In between sniffles, Regina still managed to sneer at her, “Go away, Miss Swan, I’d like to be left alone.”

“Can’t always get what you want,” the blonde jokes, sitting down next to her on the ground, but leaving sufficient distance between the two of them.

She only gets a grumble as response, and she can see Regina is trying to pull herself together so she isn’t crying in front of the blonde.

“You know, I bet my shoulder is a lot more comfortable than an empty bookshelf,” Emma comments.

Much to her surprise, Regina actually shifts so she can lean on her instead, and so the blonde gently guides her to comfortably lean on her, her right arm wrapped around her and rubbing comforting circles on her back.

And so the brunette cries on her shoulder for a while, the two of them shifting closer to each other continuously to get more comfortable, Regina ending up half on her lap and clinging to Emma, who is holding her completely now.

When she calms down a little, Emma says, “You know what I think you could use? A movie night.”

The sound of disgust coming from the older woman makes her laugh.

“No no, hear me out, I’m not talking about chick flicks. Thrillers and horror movies should do the trick, combined with _a lot_ of booze. You really don’t want to stay sober tonight.”

The brunette looks up and scrunches up her nose. “Is that really how you dealt with it?” She croaks, voice hoarse from the past hour of crying or so.

Emma nods, “Most of the time, yeah. I mean, there’s characters and special effects to make fun of, and all the gore soothes any possible homicidal tendencies.” She’d been down that road before, and without her usual inhibitions she found out that throttling someone wasn’t unlikely in that state.

Not that she remembered, but she did wake up in a cell that morning.

They’d told her she had been removed from the premises of the guy who’d dumped her the day before. In a drunken fit of rage she’d gone to his house to give him a piece of her mind, had forced her way inside, thrown some glasses, and done a whole lot of yelling. By the time she tried to strangle him, the cops had barged in and worked her towards the ground when she refused to cooperate. Unfortunately she’d fallen right on top of one of the glass shards. The newly acquired stitches above her left breast had confirmed that story.

“Fine,” the brunette concedes. “But those sticky lumps you consider snacks are not getting into my house.”


	6. Step 6: Act of True Love

They had settled on watching this terrible horror thriller Emma had picked, called Stay Alive. Being almost a decade old, the special effects were something they could definitely make fun of, and just the plot alone was pretty ridiculous already. I mean, really? Dying in the video game and then dying the exact same way in real life due to the angry ghost of an ancestor? If you want to make a horror movie, at least make the horror as real as possible and not in video game effects. Besides, it totally takes away the thrill a thriller is supposed to have, as horror games are just not that scary. It’s like the movie is spoiling itself.

It’s not a surprise that the alcohol flowed quickly in the beginning of the evening, right after dinner, if you could even call it that. She was positive this was the first time Regina had gotten take out, but neither had been in the mood to cook something, or go out in public to eat something with the risk of running into Robin. Well, unless they’d pick this fancy restaurant that he wouldn’t be able to afford, but that was too much like a date and still a bad idea.

Anyway, after two drinks Regina thought it was a good idea to make this a drinking competition, so they were drunk quite early on in the movie. Much to Emma’s surprise, the mayor could hold her liquor even better than she could, though the difference had been small. She wouldn’t hear the end of that one for a long time, she was sure.

But that wasn’t her biggest concern.

When Emma woke up that morning, she found herself in the master bedroom.

Next to Regina.

Emma was sure that there was a very valid explanation for that, something that didn’t include a drunk sex, but she had no idea. What she did know was that there was a raging headache that demanded attention. So with a groan she had left the bed, getting an aspirin before doing anything else. Like putting on some clothes. _God, am I glad Henry is at the Charming loft._

Entering the adjacent bathroom – keeping the lights off as she really did not want to see the state she was in right now – she opened the cabinet and got herself some medicine, grateful for the woman being methodical and keeping it in the most logical place. Swallowing that down with some water, she sighed. Now it was only a matter of time before it would start to kick in and relief that pounding headache.

Having taken care of her own headache, she brought a glass of water with some aspirin back to the bedroom for Regina, putting it on the nightstand next to her. Then she lay back down on top of the covers with a groan. _What the hell had happened?_

\------

_“Does he really think not playing the game will save him?”_

_“Of course, taunting the countess and her curse is your best course of action! I swear, if she doesn’t execute him, I will.“_

_“Even Robin has more brain cells than this idiot, and he thought hiding my heart in the dirt was the best way to protect it!”_

_Going by Regina’s reactions, this movie was a good choice. They were currently watching Phineus, the first idiot who thought it was a good idea to leave while the game was unfinished, as the game came to him while he was on the road. His friends took note of his absence and called him, but it was too late. He thought not having died in the game would protect him, but failed to acknowledge that the game decided his physical body could control the character as well as the controller could._

_And so he ended up being trampled by the black carriage. What a surprise._

_“You know, that carriage kind of reminds me of the one you traveled around in.”_

_Regina scoffs at that, “What, because it’s black and drawn by two black horses?”_

_“Yeah, I mean, without a clear shot there’s not much else to go on, right?”_

_“I assure you, my carriage was both more stylish and of a better quality than that contraption.”_

_“Whatever you say, your Majesty.” Emma chuckles._

\------

The aspirin is finally starting to kick in, and Emma finally feels good enough to get up and see if she can find any clues as to what happened the night before, starting with her clothes. She decides to let Regina sleep as long as she can, hopefully long enough for her to find out what transpired, before she freaks out. There’s some light coming through the light curtains, so it’s just light enough to see the ground.

She searches the ground carefully, as well as any other surfaces she comes across, only to find her underwear. The blonde sniffs her bra and is thankful to find that there’s no nasty smells attached to it. But on the other hand, that probably means she took it off voluntarily, which doesn’t quite debunk the possible drunken sexcapade. _Please, let this not be the case._

The blonde also still has to find the rest of her clothes and decides that the living room is probably a good place to start, at least to check out the mess they’ve left behind and maybe decipher in what state they left the room. She carefully slips out of the room and closes the door softly, before turning to walk down the staircase.

The staircase that is littered with their clothes.

_Well, that solves one problem._ With a sigh she picks up her own clothes so she has something to wear, quickly slipping into them. Then she picks up Regina’s as well, figuring the brunette would much rather have them in the laundry, before remembering she doesn’t even know where the laundry room is. So instead she settles on folding them and placing them on top of the staircase.

She really doesn’t want to think about what this trail means, but at this point it’s getting near impossible to deny what could have happened. _Maybe Regina will remember_ , she thinks.

_Yeah right, she’d had even more than I had._

With a sigh she continues to the living room, and she’s glad to see that it’s still pretty much intact. The TV is still looping on the movie title screen, their two glasses are on the table, still partly filled with cider, and she finds the remote abandoned in a corner of the couch. Okay, they had definitely left the room in a rush, but at least they didn’t make a big mess that has to be cleaned up and she’s thankful for that at least.

She turns off the TV before heading towards the kitchen. Next to herself needing some breakfast, she’s certain Regina could use it too when she wakes up. On her way there she catches a glimpse of her reflection, one that makes her freeze on the spot.

Emma’s face is no longer sparkly.

Gaping at her reflection, she trails a hand past the skin that was previously rough beneath her fingertips, only to find that it is indeed soft again. It’s human skin.

“HOLY SHIT!”

\------

_“That is just distasteful,” the brunette slurs, curling up her lip in disgust. Even completely intoxicated, the brunette manages eloquence with only a light slur, which is really not fair._

_On screen the Blood Countess is confronted with a more or less distorted reflection of herself, and while she screams her jaw basically unhinges. And then stays unhinged. Because for some reason, just a regular size mouth wouldn’t cut it in this terrible horror movie._

_Supposedly the Countess couldn’t handle seeing herself getting older. Her vanity is literally her downfall._

_That reminded Emma of a certain Disney villain._

_“So much for comparing you two,” Emma chuckles. “Unless you can do that too?”_

_She frowns, “You’ve been comparing me to_ that _?” At Emma’s expectant look, she shakes her head. “No, and let that be a point in my favor.”_

_“You’ve got many things on her, Madam Mayor,” the blonde grins, turning to her and subconsciously leaning in slightly. “Do you even know how beautiful you are?” She whispers, kind of in awe. “Like, nobody even comes close to it.” Regina’s pupils are dilated, but Emma can’t tell if it’s the alcohol or something else. But they do expand a little more now that their proximity is closer._

_The brunette hums, mumbling under her breath, “I bet you could give me a run for my money.”_

_Emma’s eyes shift towards her lips briefly, those plump lips that suddenly seem so appealing, but forces her gaze back to the brunette’s eyes, noticing how the distance seemed to have decreased even more. It wasn’t just her leaning in, and she now notices that the brunette’s eyes are also focused on her lips now._

_“I kind of want to kiss you r-“_

_The blonde is cut off in the middle of her admission by soft lips connecting with her own, and her eyes shut on their own. Caught up in the moment, she cups the brunette’s cheek softly, and she feels Regina nip at her bottom lip. It makes her gasp and her lips part._

_Well, that’s how it turned into a make out session. They were both so busy with each other that they had failed to notice the glowing pulse they had caused with their kiss, as well as the change in Emma._

\------

She’s still staring at her reflection when Regina barges out of her room.

“Emma, is everything alright?!”

The woman breathes out in relief upon spotting her in front of the mirror, no danger in sight, just Emma staring at her reflection. Adrenaline is still coursing through her veins, but she’s suddenly aware of the state of her own body now that she is starting to calm down. Her eyes widen in realization and she promptly returns to her room to get a robe to cover up.

The blonde takes a deep breath, preparing herself for having to explain herself to the woman. There’s at least one thing she’s certain of that happened as there is physical proof: Regina had broken the curse of the darkness on her with True Love’s Kiss. What happened after that is only a matter of guessing, unless the other woman remembers.

With a sigh she turns away from the mirror and enters the kitchen as she originally planned. She needed caffeine, breakfast could wait. She got two mugs out of the cabinet and made coffee for the both of them. She remembered that Regina preferred it with creamer in it, whereas she liked her morning coffee black as the night.

“Emma?”

“In the kitchen!”

It didn’t take long for the brunette to get to her, now appearing calmer but still obviously in light distress. Emma sighed, “I take it you don’t remember last night either?”

The woman shakes her head, “Not particularly. Thanks for the aspirin.”

“Not a problem.”

Regina takes a better look at the blonde, before she gasps. “Your skin...”

The blonde nods, “Yeah, I found out just now when I looked in the mirror. Sorry for waking you up.” Then she picked up the second mug, “But I made you coffee?”

With a smile, the woman accepted it gratefully, taking a sip of the scalding liquid. A hum leaves her lips, “Thank you, Emma.” A breath. “How?”

“Your guess is as good as mine, I don’t remember. What I do know is that I woke up next to you, just as naked, and that most of our clothes were scattered on the staircase.” Emma rakes a hand through her hair. “There’s no signs of us leaving the house either, so…”

Regina takes a few seconds to process this, possibly to find any other explanation for this newly acquired information, then shakes her head, “No, that can’t be. That’s…”

“Impossible? It’s not, Regina, look at me. What other explanation can there be? I’m pretty sure I can’t have True Love’s Kiss with a mirror!”

The woman looks like she’s about to faint and stumbles back against the counter, leaning heavily against it. “Please, leave. I-… I need some time.”

“But Regina, we-“

“I said leave!” The brunette snaps.

And so Emma disappears into a cloud of white smoke, a tear forming in her eye.

\------

_Somewhere during their make out session they had moved upstairs and shed their clothing on the way there. They were both naked on the bed now, wandering hands exploring each other while lips and tongues and teeth were clashing._

_“Wait,” Emma panted between kisses, having a moment of clarity. “You’re drunk.”_

_Regina chuckles at that, “As are you.”_

_She tries to kiss the blonde again, but Emma moves away a little further._

_“No, I mean, we can’t do this. We’re drunk, we’re going to regret doing this drunk.”_

_It seems Regina finally catches on and places a light kiss on her cheek. “I understand.” She sounds a bit dejected, she probably is._

_“But we could still cuddle?” Emma adds. “And maybe kiss a little?”_

_That returns the smile on the brunette’s face. “I suppose we could.”_


	7. Step 7: Trapped Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There goes the last chapter of the story. If there's any interest, I can write a bonus scene with Hook returning from his voyage, but otherwise this story is finished! My first finished multi-chapter story. -wipes a tear- Before I get too sappy, I'll leave you guys to read. Enjoy!

Being put on the spot, Emma had had no idea where to transport herself, and thus her instincts had taken care of that for her. She appeared in the Charmings loft and, no longer being near Regina, broke down in the middle of the living room. It didn’t take too long before she felt comforting arms around her and soft comforting words hit her ears. She let herself be led towards the couch and crawled into the person holding her.

Snow had rushed downstairs upon hearing the sobs, instinctively knowing it was Emma. The sight of her had raised a lot of questions, but those could wait until after she’d calmed down. For now, her daughter needed her. David had gone out to the park with ‘the boys’, so it was just her.

A hand was cradling Emma’s head, stroking her hair softly, another rubbing soft circles on her back as she cried. It worked like a catalyst, but at the same time it also worked incredibly soothing. She’d never had someone try to comfort her before and it set free years of bottled up sadness; she wasn’t just crying because of what happened anymore, it was tears of pain but also of relief. For the first time in years she truly felt like she had parents now. Perhaps they weren’t perfect, but they were more than what she wished for when she was a child.

She cried for what felt like an hour, but she’d never felt quite as light as she felt now. So that’s what people meant when they talked about crying being a relief. “Thanks,” she sniffles. “I needed that.”

“Of course, honey,” Snow smiles gently. “Want to talk about what happened?”

“It’s…” Emma sighs, shaking her head. “Did you visit the Blue Fairy?”

Snow nods. “She wanted to test a spell on us, one that could find someone’s True Love.”

“What happened?”

“The fairy dust landed right in front of Charming, of course. Blue was worried that the spell would not work in this world, but it worked just fine.”

“Of course the damned thing worked and she was just too stubborn to see what it meant.” Emma grumbles, gripping her forehead.

“Emma?”

The blonde shakes her head. “It’s nothing. Regina and I went to her before and she said the spell didn’t work on her, that it failed because it dropped on the floor in front of her. The thing is, it didn’t drop in front of _her_ , it dropped in front of _me_ , which both Blue and Regina refused to see.”

Her mother gapes at her. “You and Regina?”

Emma throws her a glare, “I swear, if you’re going to be just as ignorant I’m going to throw something.”

Snow shakes her head and begins to smile, “It surprised me, but if you think about it, it’s not very surprising, is it? You were the only one to challenge her, and now you two make a great team, whether it’s about magic or about parenting Henry.”

“Wait, you’re okay with this?”

“Of course I am! Love isn’t easy and predictable, your father and I used to hate each other too. If they’d have told me he was supposed to be my True Love, I would have hit them in the face with a rock as well,” she laughs. “So why don’t you tell me what happened between the two of you? You obviously kissed each other.”

“We were both drunk,” she cringes. “We can’t even remember what happened, but let’s say she wasn’t very receptive to the idea of her having broken the curse.”

“I’m sure she didn’t mean it like that, it must have shocked her too. What happened, exactly?”

Emma scrunches up her nose; is she really going to have this conversation with her _mother_? But then before she was her mother, she was Mary Margaret, her friend. Maybe she could imagine this was still her friend. “We woke up naked in Regina’s bed, our clothes were scattered on the staircase, and I’m no longer the Dark One. Those are the only things we know for sure. And when I told Regina, she sent me away.”

She swallows, willing herself not to cry again. Her life had been a series of being abandoned, time and time again. Her parents, her foster families, Neal, her friends, and now even her True Love didn’t want her around and sent her away. The one person that she was destined to be with.

Snow’s arm is around her shoulders again, “What were her exact words, Emma?”

The blonde takes a deep breath. “I… I think she said she needed some time. Before snapping at me to leave.”

A small smile forms on the older – younger? – woman’s lips. “Oh Emma, she didn’t do it to send you away, she just needs some space to sort out her thoughts. You know that it was only yesterday that she was together with Robin, and now she suddenly gets the news that you are her True Love, and not the soulmate she thought it to be for years. You, however, already knew, didn’t you?”

She nods, “Yeah… I think I get it.” Emma moves over to hug Snow properly. “Thanks, mom.”

Snow beams at that, “You’re welcome, sweetheart.”

\------

Even if she understood, it didn’t make the following week easier. Regina was actively avoiding her, even when it came to work. Normally Emma would have to deliver her paperwork once a week, but this time the mayor’s assistant stopped her and took the files instead. When she’d tried to make an appointment, her agenda had apparently been so packed there wasn’t space anywhere in the coming month.

Like hell it was.

She got that the woman needed space, but she deemed a full week more than enough to sort out your feelings regarding a certain subject, even if it was sensitive. But Emma knew her calls would go unanswered, and so she went to the only person she thought could perhaps help her with catching the woman.

Mr. Gold.

He’d woken up from his coma the night of their kiss, and though he’d been tired, his body seemed to be functioning normally again according to Dr. Whale. If he was anything like his old self, he’d still have his connections everywhere.

So she appeared in the shop in a puff of white smoke, startling Belle, who was behind the counter. “E-Emma, hey.” She stammers, before composing herself and taking a better look at her. “Is there a problem?”

“Nothing serious, but I think Gold could help me with it. Is he here?”

Belle nods, “Yes, he’s in the back with Regina.”

“With Regina?” Emma frowns. “What is she here for?”

“Oh, you haven’t heard? Rumple turned out to have some light magic when he woke up, but it’s beyond his control. He asked Regina for help, as she has experience with both light and dark magic.”

The blonde raises her eyebrows, “Really?” She remembers clearly that Gold stated he didn’t have any magic, two years in the future. But then she didn’t ask when he woke up either, and there wasn’t a True Love’s Kiss involved in that timeline either. Did Regina and herself cause that to happen?

She shakes her head, this is not the time for small talk. If Regina is in there, this is the perfect chance to get the brunette to talk to her. “I’m going in,” she states simply, walking past the counter to the back.

“Wait, Emma, you shouldn’t,” Belle tries, but it’s obvious that she’s not going to let herself be stopped, so she sighs and returns to what she was doing.

Emma enters the room, interrupting whatever the hell they were doing. “Regina, we need to talk,” she demands, loud enough to startle both of them.

There’s a flash, but nothing seems to have changed.

Except the fact that Gold seems to have disappeared. _Uh oh._

“Miss Swan! Do you realize how dangerous it is to interrupt the casting of magic?” Regina snaps, rising furiously from her seat.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were doing magic.” Emma stammers.

“This is why knocking was invented,” she huffs. The older woman draws a few calming breaths, then scans the room for remnants of magic to find out what exactly happened. A sigh of relief leaves her lips. “You’re in luck, Gold simply poofed himself elsewhere, but do be more careful next time.” And with that, she makes her gesture to poof herself out of there.

Except… That doesn’t quite happen.

Frowning, the brunette tries again, but all that happens is smoke engulfing her, before it disappears and she’s still in the exact same spot. Then she tries to poof to a different spot in the same room, which does work. “No,” she gasps, inspecting the wall.

“What? What is it?”

Regina is focusing her magic now, seemingly trying to rip the wallpaper off the wall or something like that. She screams in frustration when it doesn’t seem to work, pacing through the room. “You’ve got to be kidding me. That bastard.”

“Damnit, Regina, talk to me!” When the woman doesn’t stop pacing, she seizes her by her forearm, “What is going on?”

“The imp locked us in!” She yells exasperated, ripping her arm loose from Emma’s grip. “With blood magic!” Finally she sits down in one of the chairs, willing herself to stay calm.

Emma simply blinks, before turning to the door opening. She carefully stretches out her hand, until it bumps into something that pushes it back violently. Hissing, she realizes what Regina had tried to do before, and she gives it a shot to dismember the spell.

It’s of no use. Not even her savior magic can do it.

So the blonde opts to sit down as well, seeing as there’s not much else to do. They are trapped in the back of Gold’s shop.

“I swear, if he planned this, I will kill him,” the brunette sneers.

If he planned this, the blonde will more than likely thank him than anything else, considering this was even better than what she’d initially planned to do. But it’s also kind of annoying that she herself can’t leave now, and that there’s no control on her side. Well, unless their combined magic could take it down, but she’s going to need Regina to help her with that.

Just like Regina will need her help once she comes to the same conclusion.

Refraining from grinning, Emma clears her throat. “Can we talk now? Please?”

The brunette groans, but gestures for her to get on with it. Emma just hopes the frustration is more because of the situation than because she wants to talk.

“Okay, so… I know you said you needed to think about what happened last week, and… I get why you sent me away then, but it’s been a full week, okay? It’s been hell for me, because… Because I love you.”

Despite having the physical proof of this fact, Regina still gasps at hearing the words aloud. And then looks slightly guilty. “How long have you known?”

“The truth?” When Regina nods, she takes a deep breath. “Okay… I’ve known for about two years now.”

She frowns, “From the beginning? Why didn’t you say something?”

“No, not from the beginning. I… Present Emma is kind of trapped in the Enchanted Forest right now?” Emma looks a bit sheepish. “She’ll get out of there, but not until May 2016. And, well… She will also discover how to travel back in time then. So, technically, I’ll discover it somewhere this week?”

“What? But how? Please tell me you didn’t kill an infant to get here.”

“Nah, Nadia was too adorable to sacrifice,” Emma jokes. At Regina’s unamused expression, she turns serious. “Okay, well, I discovered quite early on that Hook didn’t do anything when I thought about him. I was struggling with the darkness, and thinking about him only made it worse because I felt guilty. But when I thought about you, it’s like this light started shining, like the darkness was running from you. Though it wasn’t really running from you, but more like trying to make me aware of my feelings for you.

“One day I was lost in thoughts about you, and I showed up at your doorstep in the middle of the night. But you were happy with Robin and you told me it was too late, which may have made me jealous and find a way to travel in time? But I couldn’t find one, and then I dreamt of the sacrifice, and suddenly it wasn’t a dream anymore but I was actually there.” She shakes her head, “It was a mess.”

Regina is frowning while she tries to comprehend what happened, “So you traveled through time and space with what, your unpredictable magic? No beans, no mermaids, no spells… Just like that?”

“Just like that,” the blonde nods. “Besides, I was being held captive in Gold’s old cell. I couldn’t just go out and look for a beanstalk.”

Hearing that, the woman’s nostrils flare. “Who was keeping you captive?” She growls.

Emma shakes her head, “I don’t know, I’ve never seen them, but whoever they were they managed to restore his cell. We destroyed it with squid ink the first time we were in there.”

That malicious glint from Regina’s old days as a Queen returned upon hearing that, only able to think of one person who could have done that. The Blue Fairy. She was the one to create it in the first place.

Emma places her hand on top of Regina’s, which pulls the woman out of it. “Hey, it’s okay. It wasn’t as strong as the original, or I wouldn’t have been able to get out.”

Hearing that, at least, is a relief. It could be an amateur that tried to copy the original spell, or build on the remnants of it, which rules out the fairies. Anyone could have done it. She sighs.

Now Emma turns to her, looking at her expectantly. “So?”

“So, what?”

“Your side of things. The whole avoiding me thing after sending me away kinda hurt, you know.”

Regina shakes her head, “I’m sorry for that, it’s… So much has been happening lately, I did need to process that, but I shouldn’t have avoided you for the rest of the week. When Blue’s spell failed I thought-“

“It didn’t fail. I had them try it on my parents, it’s supposed to fall in front of them like it did with me.” Emma laughs, remembering what the dust had done. “It actually tried to show us that it wasn’t a fluke by going around the room, going through the walls, and still ending in front of me.”

“Then I’m also sorry for not noticing that.”

“It’s not like Blue tried to correct your assumption.”

“No, I suppose she didn’t.”

“So… Does that mean you’re okay with-” Emma gestures to the two of them, “-this?”

The brunette smiles and moves over to straddle Emma’s lap, cupping her cheek and kissing her gently. “I’m very okay with this.”

Emma returns the kiss with a grin. “Awesome.” She pecks her again for good measure. “Shall we get out of here then?”

“You think our magic is stronger than blood magic?”

The blonde poofed the two of them towards Regina’s bedroom, the same position on the edge of the bed. “It faded,” she grins.

Regina hums, “Then how about we finish what we started last week.”

They’d both used magic to find out what really happened that night, remembering just how convenient having magic could be.

“Sounds like a plan.”


	8. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Or, well, maybe not a surprise. On request of SwanQueenx I decided to go through with the epilogue after all, because I do so love this story. It almost got a little bit out of hand at some point, I'm an angsty writer at heart after all, but here is the result. Enjoy (this version of) our ladies one last time ;)

_Two and a half years later… May 26 th, 2016._

Regina has been stressing all morning, Emma trying her best to calm her down and soothe her worries. Today was the day, or rather the night, where present Emma should show up, freshly poofed out of the Enchanted Forest. The past week they’d been going over all the details that the former Dark One could remember of the coming 24 hours to ensure that nothing would go wrong.

“Emma, do you realize how much is at stake here? One mistake could have you wiped from existence!” The brunette was pacing anxiously, mentally going over everything she still needed to arrange.

They’d decided it was best if they wouldn’t tell people until it was necessary to prevent any possible panicking. Emma for one wasn’t in the mood to deal with her parents thinking they could lose her all over again, not for an entire week, let alone longer. Just having Regina so worried was bad enough.

“It’ll be fine, it’s just for one day. She’s going to show up around 3am, you have to look like you haven’t slept in months – which you haven’t due to worrying too much, so that’s not going to be a problem – Henry’s going to stay over at my parents’ place, and I’m going to stay out of sight. You remember the rest, right?”

The woman nodded, of course she knew. She’d have to arrange lunch at Granny’s with Robin and Roland, act all happy family with them, and tell Emma off when she gets jealous. She’d have to enlighten Zelena about the situation so that she wouldn’t freak out about that and that she should prepare for the return of the Dark One. Henry and Emma would explain the situation to the Charmings, so there was nothing for her to do there, and Rumplestilskin and Belle would have to be informed about the situation as well, Emma’s predecessor having to hide his newfound light magic. Thankfully he was in control of that now, so it shouldn’t be too hard as it was fairly weak.

She’d have to personally stop by Gold’s shop today to make sure that he looked the part as well. Non-magical, crippled, and weakened by the coma.

But just knowing everything in theory didn’t soothe her worries about the one thing she couldn’t control: Emma herself. No matter how much she’d planned for this day, the blonde would remain a variable beyond her control, which frightened her.

One mistake and she’d never see Emma again.

Emma notices the brunette’s distress only seems to get worse, and she sighs softly. She slips her arms around the pacing woman from behind to stop her, gently pulling her back against her body to hold her, resting her chin on Regina’s shoulder. “Hey, we’ve got this, okay? We already know that if everything goes the same as before, my actions won’t differ from then. I managed to get the story back on track once, this time will be no different. Well, save for one thing of course…”

Regina hums softly, and Emma can feel the tension slowly fade. “And what would that be?”

She grins, “This time, instead of a _boozy pirate_ , I’ve got the most beautiful and intelligent woman of all the realms on my side.”

“Is that so?” The woman smirks. “How do you know this isn’t a malicious scheme to get rid of you? Being frozen in time can make one patient.”

Emma chuckles, “I bet it does. I trust the past 4 something years have been genuine with all the saving each other, that’s how I know. I trust you.”

With a smile, Regina kisses the savior softly. “Get to your parents, you sap.”

“Love you too, _babe._ ” She squeezed the woman’s buttocks as she said this, laughing as she disappears in her usual white smoke, making the brunette gasp.

“I’ll get you for that tomorrow!”

\------

The preparations had gone smoothly, everyone who needed to know their part so far knew what to do. Time was ticking by too slowly for Regina’s liking. Emma had tried to distract her through texts, but it hadn’t helped much and she’d tried to drown out her impatience with music. It worked better, though it still felt like an eternity.

And now it was almost 3.

Emma hadn’t known the exact time of her arrival, but estimated it around that time. Any second now the Dark One could appear on her doorstep and anxiety was building up. She’d learned how to deal with that due to Cora and her reign as a Queen, always having to appear strong even when she wasn’t, but she found she’d never been quite this anxious yet.

Not even that night with Daniel could touch this. With Daniel she’d been hopeful, about to escape the clutches of her mother. Even when they were caught, her mother had managed to give her hope briefly, though she’d crushed that quickly.

Now, however, there was nothing to be gained, only something – some _one_ – to lose. Without exaggeration, the last two years had been the best of her life. They had their differences, of course, but they always managed to resolve it one way or another. To lose that, to lose _Emma_ , just the thought terrified her.

Then there was knocking, interrupting that thought process.

She gasped, then rushed down the staircase towards the door. According to Emma, she would still be zoned out at that point, so the brunette had time to compose herself, though it was uncertain how much time. Steeling herself with a final breath, she put on her frustrated mask for being interrupted.

Regina opens the door to reveal Emma, just as expected. Her frustration drops easily and she just openly gapes at the woman now. _If I mess this up, this might be the last time I see her._

That thought is apparently reflected in her eyes, because before long the blonde’s arms are around her in a tight embrace. She allows herself this moment and returns it, holding onto Emma as if it’s the last time she’ll ever be able to.

It might be, but she needs to not think about that right now, she can’t think that way.

When she feels steady enough to start the act, she pulls back from the embrace. The instant it’s gone, she misses the feeling, but she can’t show weakness now. So she sighs.

“Miss Swan, do you realize some people are trying to sleep at this ungodly hour?”

\------

Regina had almost hoped Emma would have gone for the guest bedroom this time, but sleeping in her bed is one of the key decisions that should not be changed. She just wanted to cuddle up to the blonde and never let her go, but knew she couldn’t do that.

She was horrified when she found out her arm had still found its way to Emma’s waist when she woke up.

Other than that the morning was going smoothly. She’d be able to make her call to Zelena in time and was thankful to see the woman so understanding. In the past two years they’d made amends, both setting aside their differences. Regina was still fond of Roland, a fondness that was mutual, so they decided it was best if they could get along. The redhead was still easily provoked when it came to jealousy, so informing her had been a necessity since she and Robin were a family now.

Robin, unfortunately, doesn’t take too well to all this.

“ _You want me to do what?”_

“I need you and Roland to go on a lunch date with me,” she repeats simply.

_“Regina, that ship has sailed, I can’t go on a date with you. Not with Zelena and-”_

“I’m not asking you to date me, you idiot, Emma only needs to _think_ we’re dating.”

_“But why? You’re dating Emma, can’t you just tell her you’re dating her already?”_

The brunette sighs in exasperation, she’ll never understand what she ever saw in Robin. He’s a knucklehead with a brain so small, it would be a compliment to call him a pea-brain. “It doesn’t work that way. Magic is emotion, and to travel in time she needs to be insanely jealous of you, and willing to fight for me.”

_“Why does she need to travel in time at all? If this Emma is from our timeline, why not just keep her in our timeline and be with this Emma?”_

Well, at least this question is sensible. Not that it would work. “Because there is no telling what will happen if we keep her; it will create a time paradox because my Emma will never have been here. Best case scenario, it could cause untold damage to our memories. Again.” You’d think having your memories altered once or twice is enough, let alone thrice like most citizens of Storybrooke. No need to add a fourth time.

_“Fine. What do you need us to do?”_

With a relieved sigh, she proceeds to tell him everything he needs to know. She’s barely finished with the conversation when she hears the telltale creaking of her stairs, signaling Emma is on her way. Thankfully she doesn’t ask who was on the phone.

Lunch feels incredibly awkward, and Regina can’t believe Emma could possibly fall for this, fears the blonde could see right through both of them. Roland isn’t very aware of what is happening, just enjoys a friendly lunch with his aunt and father, which she is grateful for. It provides a distraction that both of them readily embrace.

But if she thought the initial conversation was awkward, it gets even worse when the fake flirting begins. Neither is comfortable with this, but Robin seems to be the better actor in this case. Or perhaps all his emotions look the same and it just doesn’t stand out that he’s uncomfortable.

When Emma stomps off towards the bathroom, Regina couldn’t be more relieved; she bought it. The relief is only brief however, because now she has to go and worsen the damage done. She has to hurt Emma, and it’s the last thing she wants to do, but it’s a necessary evil.

She finds most of the practiced dialogue – Regina insisted on practicing whatever Emma could remember – is easier to perform than expected. She’s genuinely surprised at the effects of their little play, the level of her jealousy being off the charts. It also comes as a surprise to her that the woman has no idea what year it is, a detail Emma left out, perhaps didn’t think it necessary as Regina knows to fill her in.

When she leaves the restroom, she seats herself back on her original seat across the two Hoods to continue their lunch, just in case Emma decides to walk rather than poof herself this time.

“Did it work?” Surprisingly, Robin actually sounds concerned.

“It looks like it, but we can’t be sure until tonight. It’s on Rumple, Zelena, and her parents now.”

\------

The upside of not having to deal with present Emma for the rest of the day was that her Emma could now visit her. The downside was that she was no longer in control of what was happening, their fate being in the hands of seven other people, including 2 toddlers! Not to mention that if she ran into an 8th person accidentally, it could be a problem as well.

Let alone running into herself.

When white smoke started to form in her living room, Regina didn’t think twice about pulling the figure into a hug. “Oh thank god, you’re back.”

The arms that wrapped around her worked as an instant relief, worries leaving her body even though they technically weren’t out of the danger-zone yet. So long as Emma was here though, things were on track. “Of course I’m back, and I’m here to stay,” the woman soothes.

Regina buries her face into the crook of Emma’s neck, mumbling, “For the rest of our lives?”

“For the rest of our lives,” she confirms. The blonde doesn’t even gasp or flinch at the notion anymore.

The older woman inhales deeply, bracing herself, before pulling back enough to look at her face. “Would you marry me if we get through this?”

That does provoke a reaction.

Emma’s eyes widen and there _is_ a gasp this time, but she doesn’t look like she wants to run away, Regina knows what that looks like by now. “Are you serious? After your previous marriage, you’d marry me?”

Regina swallows harshly at the mention of that time, of her marriage to Leopold, of all the things that she didn’t control and didn’t want. But she’s serious about this, she wants to commit to Emma fully, even if that means she’ll have to face her demons from back then.

Somehow Emma catches on though, on what’s going through her mind. Her eyes always did betray her. “Regina, no. I won’t do that to you, it’s not going to do any of us good.” The blonde shakes her head. “If you’re asking if I’d commit my life to you, I absolutely would, but not through marriage.”

Though she loathes to admit it, Emma is right about this. Marriage only ever mistreated her. Daniel was her fiancé and died, Leopold was her husband and was far from benevolent to her. He, too, eventually died, though it was by her own hand. Sometimes Emma seems to understand her better than she understands herself, but then the reverse can often be said too.

“Isn’t there some other kind of ritual, magical or not?” The blonde continues, “Or maybe we can just make our vows and get a different item to symbolize that? It would be a lot more personal and still kind of have the idea of getting married, but it’s not a marriage. Does that make sense?”

She could think of a few magical binding spells that could work, that were often used in the Enchanted Forest for pledging loyalty to a royal. The brunette can’t help but chuckle at the thought of a particular one. “Magical commitments are rather… extreme at times, especially the repercussions of breaking it, may it be accidental or not.” She smiles and cups the blonde’s cheek. “But that sounds like a lovely idea, my sweet. I know just the enchantment for it.”

Emma grins as Regina leans in for a kiss, which gets reciprocated happily.

“Yeah? What does it do?”

“It ties the love of a person to an object. If you were to touch it, it would fill you with the loving warmth of that person for you.” She laughs lightly, “Or the coldness of that person’s hatred, depending on the relationship with the one touching it.”

That makes Emma laugh too, “I’ll make sure not to let my mother touch it, then.”

Regina scrunches up her nose. “You know I stopped hating her years ago.”

“What, are you going to tell me that if she were to touch it, she’d get all warm and fuzzy?”

“Well, I wouldn’t go _that_ far…”

Emma chuckles, “Okay, _when_ we get through this, I’d love to do that with you.”

“God I love you, you know that?” The brunette beams.

“I love you, too.”

 

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how they lived happily ever after.


End file.
